Breath By Painful Breath
by EmoLovez
Summary: How do you play a game that can't be won? When do you stop loving after a loss? How do you trust after being lied too? Can you live after seeing so much death? could a love brought from the flames of despair last? Katniss and Peeta are back in the arena, and it is clear they both aren't going to make it out alive
1. Chapter 1

*Katniss POV*

The sun had shown ever so bright on the sand after we had finally escaped the forest. The screams and cries of my loved ones still echoed through my skull causing violent tremors to occasionally rack my body. I sat in silence watching as my hands trembled. People were talking behind me but I couldn't bother to listen.

I looked up from my hands slowly, scanning my eyes across the sand until I catch glimpse of Finnick sitting a couple of feel into the water. I can see him shaking the same way I am.

Without thinking I pulled myself off the ground and slowly walked to Finnick. The water was warm against my feet, when I was about calf deep I sat beside him. Neither of us spoke or took our eyes off the water.

The water was so clear in the shallow areas, I could see my hands that rested gently in my lap, I could see my legs, although the image would blur occasionally from the gentle pulse of the waves.

My eyes wander a little to my left I see Finnick hand bobbing palm down just beneath the surface of the water. I will myself to hear the rest of the world for a moment, at first the gentle lullaby of the water christened my ears. Then after a moment, the softest of sobs came from my left. I could feel tears swelling in my eyes but blink them back quickly. 'I will not cry' I tell myself. Instead I slowly place my hand on top of his, squeezing it gently.

His eyes shoot to mine and what I saw was over whelming. His perfect blue eyes where tinted gray with sorrow, the whites of his eyes stained red from tears that rolled off his face and into the water. His gorgeous face was contorted in a way I would never have thought possible. He was still beautiful and I doubt highly that that will ever change, but he was beautiful in the way that fire was beautiful. It was all too much for me.

Regardless of my attempts tears burned in my eyes as memories of my home and my loved ones flashed through my mind. Slowly I could feel Finnick hand tighten around mine, and I knew he was doing the same as me. I had only heard one unfamiliar voice echo through the trees. 'She must mean the world to him' I thought to myself.

"Her name is Annie," he choked out through the lump in his throat. "And yes she is my everything." I looked over at him in confusion; he smiled weakly, "you said that out loud."

I looked away blushing, "I'm sorry I..."

"No need to be sorry, curiosity is a natural thing." He said, still holding tight to my hand. "You have many people who love you."

I shudder, remembering the shrill cry that had been prims voice begging for help, begging for me to save her. Tears begin to fall again as I remember how helpless I was, the feeling of hopelessness at the hands of the capital. At this my breathing picked up as rage courses through my veins.

To my surprise, Finnick shifted so that he was closer to me, slowly releasing my hand and placing it around my waist, holding me against him. I don't know what came over me but I felt comfort in his embrace I sat there for a moment before resting my head against his shoulder, trying to clear my mind of all thoughts off home, trying to focus on the task at hand.


	2. Chapter 2

*Peeta POV*

Johanna stood beside me and was going on about something I wasn't particularly worried about what it was. She was a great girl and an excellent fighter but she had a tendency to bitch about the stupidest things. My focus was on Katniss, I just wanted to know that she was going to be ok. I watched her torment, though witnessed none of it myself. I flinched slightly at the thought of her on the ground, hands pressed tight to her ears, I couldn't hear her but I knew she was screaming, Tears erupting from her eyes. For an hour I watched her, helpless. Unable to comfort her or take her away from that hell. As soon as the hour was up she had walked right past me as though I didn't exist. Finnick had done the same thing.

Katniss took post in the sand and Finnick the water. Not looking at anything not speaking to anyone and probably not hearing us either.

"Are you even listening to me?" Johanna said looking annoyed.

"I'm sorry," I said looking at my hands, "what were you saying?"

"Beetie has an idea for getting rid of the careers, but..." she paused looking over at Finnick and Katniss, who were now in the water together, "We need them to be highly functioning for it to work."

"Give them some time; they have been through something that the two of us may never understand." I say looking at her.

"Your right," she said, looking upset "there is no one left that I love." And with that she walked away the hint of tears in her eyes.

I watched as she went to the edge of the forest, crouching in the shade, a couple yards from Beetie. I looked over to Katniss and I felt my heart sink. They were sitting beside each other, she had her head on his shoulder and he had his arm around her. I looked away quickly, grabbing the spiel from the sand and looking for a tree.

I kept the edge of the forest in my sight I wanted nothing less than to be trapped in an unknown circle of hell for an hour. I found the broken shell of what I assume is a giant nut of some kind; it looked like it would make a nice enough cup. I banged the spiel into a tree and waited. When the water began to flow I placed my mouth beneath it gulping down the sweet liquid. I then filled the shell to the top. Removing the spiel and heading back to the beach.

When I returned the four of them were sitting in a circle in the shade of the trees, they are all silent. I walk over to Katniss and hand her the shell.

"Thank you," she says and I place a light kiss on the top of her head. "Beetie was just telling us his plan for getting rid of the careers." She continued.

Then Beetie began explaining his plan again and I was only half listening, I was more focused on Katniss, she was still upset but for the sake of the group she pushed past it. I stiffened slightly as she handed the shell to Finnick after taking a few sips herself.

I took a deep breath 'we are all on the same side; it is the friendly thing to do.'

"Did I explain that well enough?" Beetie asked looking at me expectantly.

"Yeah, so we are basically going to electrocute them." I replied

"Prosaically."

"We will get started first thing tomorrow. Who wants to take first watch?" To my surprise it was Johanna who spoke, "we already decided it would be Finn and Katniss. You and I will be taking second watch."

"Fine," I said getting up and walking to the water's edge. I looked over at the sunset, just as someone's arms twisted around me, "they make the most beautiful sunsets."

"That they do," Katniss replied placing a soft kiss on my neck before resting her chin on my shoulder. "The sky is never that orange."

"It's one of the nice things about being here."

"How can anything here be nice, Peeta, we are fighting for our lives, killing people." There is silence for a moment.

I turn to face her wrapping my arms around her waist, "I get to be with you, this place would be hell without you. Every day I see your face and it gives me the strength to keep going, to keep fighting. For you, for us."

She smiled, kissed me passionately, and then said "you should get some rest."

"Your right," and with that we walked back over to the others and I left here by the fire with Finnick.


	3. Chapter 3

_hello everyone i would really appreciate it if you could review and let me know how you like the story so far :) your all wonderful thank you _****

*Finnick POV*

As we sat there in the dark the fire light danced across her face, telling the story of the night in the shadows. I did everything I could not to stair, she was always beautiful, but it was a tragic beauty Brought on by years of hardship and struggle, of loss and pain; Though in this light there was something different. In the dim light of the embers there was a strength about her, I could see the warrior within.

"I'm going to go get some more wood." She said pulling me from my thoughts, "would you mind getting us some water?"

I looked at her for a moment, her eyes met mine before they shot to the ground, she was scared. And I didn't blame her, what lurked in the forest was hell on earth and she didn't want to get stuck there alone. I nodded flashing me best smile, "of course."

We got up in silence and headed into the trees, I walked with her as she picked up little sticks, when her arms were almost full I stopped by a tree to get water. She kept walking as I filled up the shell that Peeta had found.

There was a scream, and a cannon fire echoed through the air. I dropped the shell and started running. "Katniss?!" I could hear breathing. "Katniss where are you?" I whispered loudly.

"I'm over here Finnick." She said, I took a couple steps and found myself in a small clearing. There was a body on the ground, "get him off of me I can't breathe." She said with labored breaths. Quickly I pulled the body off of her.

"What happened?" I asked concern over taking me.

"I heard the knife whistle through the air and I ducked," she winced holding the gash in her arm, "I wasn't quick enough though."

"Let's get back to camp." I said gathering the sticks that she had dripped. As we walked back I noticed that she was limping.

When we got back to the beach I stoked the fire to a dull roar so that I could see how bad her arm was.

I walked over to her and examined her arm, the cut was deep but not life threatening, it needed to be cleaned and covered. Infection comes on fast in climates like this. "Stay here, if I get jumped, just stay there." I looked her in the eyes as I said this, she is the important one. She needs to get out of here alive.

"But-"

"No buts Katniss, promise me."

"I promise."

With that I walked into the woods staying closer to the beach then before, I needed clean water to wash the wound.

Upon my return Katniss was sitting propped up bow drawn, ready. I raised my hands above my head in surrender. She smiled and put it down. I slowly walked over to her and took the knife that was sitting on the ground beside her. "Is this the knife?" I asked, she simply nodded in reply.

Using the knife I cut the bottom part of my sleeve off of my shirt, and placed it in my lap. "How did you get him?" I asked as I slowly poured water on the wound.

She shrugged, "I'm really not sure," she flinched as I wrapped the fabric around the cut, not making a sound, "one second he was running at me, and the next," she looked up at me, "he was dead."

My eyes met hers for a moment, but she quickly looked over to the fire. "Peeta is going to kill me for letting you get hurt." I said, a hint of amusement, 'well he could try', I thought to myself.

She smiled absentmindedly, "you don't need to worry about him, I may have gotten hurt, but I would have suffocated if you hadn't pulled him off of me." She looked up at me again. Without thought I dipped my hand in the water and gently washed a mud spot from the side of her face, my hand lingering there after it was gone. We sat there for a moment looking into each other's eyes. Then the fire cracked and she jumped a little looking away. I pulled my hand back getting comfortable in the sand.

"Can I ask you something?" She was looking at the fire puzzled.

I laid back looking at the sky, "anything."


	4. Chapter 4

_Authors note _

_hello everybody! please review and follow if you like it! Should have a new chapter soon! Enjoy!_

*Katniss POV*

"Tell me about Annie?" I asked avoiding his gaze even though I knew he was looking at me.

"She's my baby sister," he said then was silent for a moment, "she's 10 now, and she's all I have left." He was silent again for a long time.

"What happened to your parents?" I asked in a small voice.

He was quiet for a moment, I was about to apologies when he said, "a year after I won the games they died in a boating accident." He paused for a moment, "it was a common enough thing in my district, but it left me and Annie alone, not that we had to worry about food or shelter, but still its hard growing up without parent."

"Finnick I'm so sorry," I said searching for something more to say. Before I could it caught my attention that he was staring at me, pain showing only in his eyes, but there was something else lurking in them that I couldn't define. "What?" I asked feeling self-conscious beneath his gaze.

He looked away into the fire, as if searching for something to say, but he never said anything, "Finnick?" I asked bringing his attention from the flame.

"Sorry I... I was just ..." he paused looking into the fire again, "lost in thought." He said and I could see tears swelling I his eyes but he blinked them back. I was curious but too afraid to ask what he was thinking about. I felt as though I had already crossed a line.

I could help but think about Annie, what she looks like; I imagined she had the sane sandy blond hair as Finnick, only strait. I smiled a little, but it quickly faded. This little girl could end up completely alone, because of me. My mind flashed to prim and my mother, at least she would have someone to take care of her and love her. I couldn't imagine leaving her alone in this messed up world. We sat there in silence for a long time. It quickly became too much for me. I began to shiver although it was very warm.

"Katniss," Finnick said looking at me, I avoided his gaze, "everything is going to be okay." I nodded sheepishly, not wanting him to know what I was really worried about ... I couldn't kill this man, I couldn't. If it came down to it, I simply would let him kill me instead. Tears began to stream down my cheeks as I came to peace with the fact that I was going to die. I pulled my knees to my chest, hiding my face in my knees. There was silence.

I jumped when I heard something move behind me. "Sorry." Finnick said sitting behind me. One leg went along my side while the other remained bent at my other side, he rested his hand on my shoulder and slowly pulled me too him. A sob broke through my lips as he wrapped his arms around me, "it's going to be okay, Katniss." He cooed softly, "shhhh sh shhh." He continued rubbing circles into my arm with his thumb.

If only he knew, nothing was ever going to be alright. Weather I live or die, nothing has been okay since the last games. I'm dead either way, I only just realized it.

I turned in his arms, so that my side was against his stomach, I turned my face into his arm, and tried to keep my sobs silent. I didn't need to wake Peeta up with my weakness. He needs all the rest he can get.


End file.
